992 – Practice your reaction. You know your child will spill something in the car. You know they will spill something on the couch. You know they will spill something somewhere at sometime at some point. Because you know this will happen, because it will happen, walk around the house and think about the reaction you immediately have thinking about “blank” being spilled on “blank”. Have that reaction. Own it. Now. Do better.
You can get the frustration and upsettness (not a word apparently, but totally should be) out of your system to have a more measured and constructive response next time. The real time. Instead of yelling, or overreacting (ya drama queen, or drama gender neutral person). You can address it calmly and succinctly. You can model a measured, immediate response (if actual cheers don’t happen, you can imagine them in your head).
As an example my daughter jumped at me yesterday morning stamping my face with a stamp. My response we not measured, but immediate. Ya see, being punched in the face first thing in the morning with a stamp wasn’t something i had planned for, prepared for, anticipated, or expected… oddly enough. Yet… YET, i had practiced responses to odd random things from my daughter before. If not practiced, already experienced. So, i walked away. Brushed my teeth, washed my face. Took a minute. Went back and addressed it.
Tonight, she spilled her cheesy popcorn (pop popcorn, get a cheese packet from a Mac and cheese box and sprinkle it over the popcorn. My stoner uncle’s girlfriend made this for me one night when he put me in front of Aliens and got stoned. Scared the *blank* out of me for most of the rest of my life. When i went into the kitchen, i was told to stay out of, but hungry and fear overrode this order, his wickedly attractive girlfriend made cheesy popcorn for me. I think my pre-pubescent adolescent self overrode fear for the hot chic paying attention to me and making me a simple yet amazing treat). And now my daughter gets to benefit from a random hot chick making me popcorn while stoned.
AAAAANNNWWWWWAAAYYYYY… she spilled her cheesy popcorn on the floor and immediately said ‘I’m sorry”, in a sad tone that always makes my heartbreak, but that’s a story for another time. My response, “It’s okay. It was just an accident. That’s what they make vacuums for. Just pick up what you can and we’ll get the rest later”.
No harm. No foul. No over reaction. Just an accident with a calm measured, immediate response. See? Practice.
A Better Father 