Yesterday, talking with my stepdad he mentioned stopping by McDonald’s drive thru leaving Florida. There are many problems with that, in my mind. Personal health. Supporting a company manipulates millions with advertising, etc. No reason to rabbit hole on that now. Either you understand where I am coming from and agree. Or you do not. Either way, the point of this post is that it is none of my business.
In the process of saying, “You better get a hotel with a nice bathroom”, a reference to what the food will do to his gut, I got out of the car and the phone disconnected from the Bluetooth headset.
Instead of going back to get the phone and call him back, I left the phone in the car. Choosing, instead, to walk around Meijer and take a pause moment. To breath. To process. To wonder.
To conclude that, it is none of my $%^%^&%^ business. Why would one feel the need to comment on a grown man’s choice of what and where to eat? It is none of my gosh darn business. Get off your horse and stop.
It was happenstance the pause moment happened. It was not observed as a pause moment initially. The pause gave a moment to think about the “why” of what was being said. Shaming him. Making fun of him. If the goal is to create change, is not going to work. Getting in a dig on a guy getting food is not exactly honorable. It is more a bullying behavior than anything.
There is a quote that has been with me for years, “you can be right, or you can be happy.” It is pretty. It feels good. It sounds good. I can be right about all the wrongs of eating at McDonalds’ but making sarcastic comments does not help anyone. It can make people feel badly about themselves, or the person saying it, or both.
The problem with the above quote, in relation to this moment, and one of the reasons I have come to have problems with quotes recently, is life does not get broken down that easily. When we are given the quick hit that sounds pretty, we tend to follow because it is easy. You do not have to choose to be right or be happy. You can be both, and neither. You can be happy in being right.
The purpose is not being right or being happy. It is how we communicate that matters. It is identifying the right time to say something. Happiness came not from being right or wrong but from shutting up. From letting someone talk. There was no reason to interject. Agree or disagree, move on.
Walking around Meijer, no podcasts no music, no conversation, was cathartic. A random gift of getting cut off in that moment was appreciated. I called him back and made no mention of where we had left off. There was no reason. Not that long ago, I would have been looking forward to picking up where we left off. I may have even gone back to the car to get my phone to continue the point of how bad McDonald’s is. In that moment, my Talking was the only wrong. There was no purpose beyond conversation.
One does not need to choose to be right or happy. Both are subjective. Choose both and choose neither. It was one moment. Be better. If you are not. Try again next time.
Posted. Not Perfect.
A Vegan Father… working on being better.
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